October 15th

Today is pregnancy and infant loss awareness day.

A year ago the end of August I lost my third little baby. I still to this day, think of what that little baby would have looked like. Would I finally have a baby that had my looks, maybe my green eyes instead of daddy's brown ones. Would it be a boy or girl? I'm fairly certain it was another little boy, a little brother for Ty to love on, and play trains and cars with. A little baby for Storie to touch and watch grow. A little baby that if it were here would be almost 6 months old right now, maybe starting to crawl, and trying baby food for the first time. Oh how my life would be different with a third little one added in.

Today we just remember all the babies that we have lost.

Uplifting reminder

Yesterday on my birthday the whole family went down to Lamberts. I decided to wear my angel wing necklace with Reese's letter and the birth month stone, I have not worn it in awhile. When we got down there I took the kids to the bathroom and in the stall I was in on the wall there happened to be some writing on the wall. The spot I chose to look at while waiting on T to finish said "Jesus loves you" and had the date of April 27, 2011 That was my due date for baby Reese. When we got home I was going through the money I had left and on the last dollar bill someone else had written Jesus loves you and so do I. It made me realize that I was hurting inside still for baby Reese and I didn't even know it. Made my heart smile as if Reese were saying it was okay and that he loved me and so did Jesus.
<3

finally

We are FINALLY DEBT FREE. I couldn't be more excited. I'd shout it from the roof tops if I could. No more credit card debt, no more truck loan, no more personal loan. We are 100% debt free from everything.

Now we are on to saving saving saving. We are trying to save up at least 6 months of basic bare minimum living expenses just to keep in our savings account. After that we will be saving for a down payment on a house and putting even more money into T & S's college fund.

anyways the end is near, we are so ready to have daddy back.

We still have no idea what we're doing as far as enlisting or getting out. I'm freaking out on the inside, but trying to stay calm and collected to everyone else. At this point I'm just ready for the Mr to be back home again where he belongs. This is hard on me, hard on him, and really hard on the kids. They know daddy is gone, but they're not quite sure where or when he's coming back. They are having a good time at Nana & Papa's house though, but T has been saying lately that he misses his Thomas the train and he's ready to go back home. Me too buddy! Me too.

Milspouse Friday Fillin

1)Does your Significant Other read your blog? Why is this a good or a bad thing?
Yes, I'm pretty sure he does occassionally. ehh, he pretty much knows everything there is to know about me, I tell him how I'm feeling most times, there are sometimes though that I wish I could put my feelings out in blog world where no one really knew who I was and I could just say how I felt.

2)What is one item in your house that holds the most sentimental value and why?
It is probably all my pictures we've had taken over the years. I love my pictures. I can look back and remember everything we were doing/how old the kids were, etc.

3)When it comes to water fun in the summer do you prefer the beach, the pool, a lake, or the sprinklers?
I would rather do the pool or the sprinklers over the beach. I love the beach but it is so messy so for just an ordinary day I'd rather stay home and use the sprinklers.

4)What is the one special thing that you do for yourself to get you through the first week of a deployment/separation?
I cry, there's nothing really different that I do. I'm just super alone and I'm upset so I just cry. After about the first month I become use to the feeling so it's not as big of a deal, but there are still times I cry cause I'm alone and I hate it.

5)What is your biggest guilty pleasure website?

RAW

I'm new to this, but I thought it would be fun to give it a try. So here is my photo for RAW. It has to be completely untouched and since I'm no photographer that's all I ever have. Anyways the theme this week is AMERICA.



What better picture than my husband (and daddy) leaving for another 6 month deployment. We're missing him very much this Fourth of July so here's to you babe. Come Home Soon! We love you!

Milspouse Friday Fill In

1. Do you think civilians, in general, understand the meaning of Memorial Day?
I think many may have an idea of what it is, but I think the true meaning of it is often buried in bbqs, sales, and the unofficial beginning of summer. We all need to really remember the true reason behind Memorial Day: to remember the men/women who have given the ultimate sacrifice in fighting for our freedom over the years.
Thank you to all the military out there that are currently fighting for our country, giving up your time, your family, and some your lives so we can be free.
Thank you to my husband too who is currently serving his 3rd deployment overseas. We love you and miss you so much.

2. What are your plans for the Memorial Day Weekend?
There is a 100 mile yard sale that starts up today and goes all weekend. I am so excited to go out looking!

3. What skill/talent do you wish you had?

I wish I could sew...that's something I have on my list this summer.

4. Which came first: the chicken or the egg?

The chicken...but then how did the chicken get here unless it came from an egg, but how would an egg get here? It had to have been layed from a hen...i'm still going with the chicken ;)

5. What is the best thing about your post (base)? The worst?

I love that our base is so big and there is so much you can do on it. All the stores, the Nex, the commissary, movie theaters, bowling alley, etc. The worst is that it is SO big that our military housing is located off base since it couldn't possibly host all the families. I really miss living on the actual base. For some reason I always felt safer.

Milspouse Friday Fill-in

1. What is one of the things you always do special when your husband returns from a deployment?
As soon as I pick him up from the pier we go home to change his clothes and rest for a bit, but than we always go to lunch/supper at Cheesecake Factory. It's a tradition. We've done it for the last 3 deployments now. We just spend as much family time together at home, going to the park, just low key.

2. What do you do to help your spouse and/or yourself re-adjust after a deployment or long separation?
I let him do his own thing for awhile since he is use to it being alone on the boat for 6 months and if he does something different than what i've been doing I will just let it go.

3. Are you a crazy coupon clipper (I’m becoming one, so share your secrets with me)?
Not really. I try to clip some coupons that work for me, but I don't go out of my way to get things I'm not going to need that week just because they're on sale.

4. What’s your most treasured memory of you and your spouse (not counting your wedding – that’s a given)?
Maybe moving out to VA right after we were married. We were finally married and on our own, living in a new place just the two of us. It's been awesome having new adventures just us as a family.

5. If you could live anywhere overseas, what would you pick and why?
Probably Italy or Japan